I wasn’t my usual chipper self when giving this interview, and when I received the notes back I realised that I sound like a proper arsey little madam!
1. I was surprised when you told me that Porters in a College don’t actually carry any bags for anyone. They simply guard the keys.
Portering is far more than just guarding keys, I assure you! The Porters ensure the smooth running of the day-to-day business of College life, handling everything from the post to broken hearts. They are the backbone of academia – providing security, advice and a friendly ear at any time of the day or night. Guarding keys, indeed. Pah! Philistine.
2. PorterGirl is a work of fiction but based heavily on your life as the first female Deputy Head Porter at a Cambridge college. What was the hardest thing about writing this book?
There was nothing hard about writing the book at all, I loved writing the book. Editing the book, promoting the book – that’s another story.
3. Was there lots you had to leave out so you weren’t sued? If so, can you hint at some of them?
There was never any question of me being (successfully) sued, the libel laws in this country leave a lot of scope for satire and parody. Although the publicity would be handy right about now, don’t you think? There are certainly things I could have written differently to give a more accurate account of my time there, but it wouldn’t have been as much fun. If you are hinting at nefarious goings on, well – it’s all in there, one way or another, if you know where to look.
4. It is a story about a woman finding it hard to fit in to what was a male dominated world. What are your views on that word then and now?
I came into that world wide-eyed and dumbfounded by the history, the elitism and the sheer otherworldliness of it all. As a very working class girl with little education to speak of, it really was like entering Wonderland. The casual misogyny was quite amusing at first and, to be honest, in reality it was limited to a few antiquated old duffers who probably still thought there was a war on. A lot of people were quite pleased to see me. That didn’t last long. Although it is a world I could never really fit in to, I have enormous respect and admiration for Cambridge University. You don’t get to be at the top of your game for over 800 years without doing something right.
5. PorterGirl isn’t a super hero though some might think she sounds like one, you just need the cape and knickers over your trousers. What super powers would you give her and why?
Invisibility, so she could listen in to all the plotting, unnoticed.
6. And what about you Lucy Brazier, what super powers would you like and why?
A bottomless stomach and a psychotic metabolism, so I could eat all the time and not get fat. Also being able to turn water into wine would be cool. I can do it the other way round, but that’s not so special.
7. PorterGirl is a murder mystery, I’ll not give too many spoilers, of who, how or when. Who are your favourite murder mystery writers and why?
Agatha Christie is the absolute last word in murder mystery. No one does it as well as her. Her mysteries are so devilishly crafted and her characters beautifully presented. In all her books, the clues are there for the reader to solve, if only they can pick them out. She is also the master of the red herring, a notoriously tricky thing to pull off in writing.
8. If PorterGirl was made into a movie or TV series who would you like to play the lead role and why?
It has been mentioned before that Sheridan Smith would be perfect. Although Eddie Izzard in drag would probably be closer to what I am actually like.
9. If they did, would you do a cameo role and if so what part would you give yourself?
Absolutely not, I hate being on camera. But if I absolutely had to, I would play a visiting food tester who embarks upon a passionate affair with Head Gardener (played by Sean Bean).
10. Are we to read more PorterGirl murder adventures? If so can you hint at the next story?
There will certainly be more PorterGirl, but the murders are the sub-plot, really. The next tale will involve a mysterious theft and relations with arch rivals Hawkins College will be further inflamed when they are implicated. But all is not as it seems and our bowler hatted heroes find themselves embroiled in something quite unexpected. Old College has a bloody and brutal history, however, and that isn’t going away any time soon.
11. Is there romance in PorterGirl’s life? If so, when and with who?
I have no idea how to write romance, so the chances of her having anything beyond a passing flirtation are slim. She has always held a torch for The Dean, of course, but College hierarchy could never allow for a relationship between a member of The Fellowship and a College servant. There is a quirky American Professor who joins Old College at the same time she does and there is definitely an attraction between them. We will have to wait and see how that develops. Illicit romps with Head Gardener (played by Sean Bean) are a possibility.
12. How much of you is in PorterGirl and how much of her is in you?
Deputy Head Porter is just me with all the flaws airbrushed out. When I first started writing the blog, I was still at the College and it was a documentation of my time there, so I was writing very much in my own ‘voice’. She is a heavily filtered version of me. The unfiltered version of me would not work well with cosy fiction.
13. What do you like most about writing PorterGirl?
It just writes itself! It is an awful lot of fun to write and because it doesn’t fit squarely into any particular genre or style, I can write it just how I want.
14. What advice would you give to any up and coming writer or someone trying a new career for that matter?
I am still up and coming myself, so all I can advise is just keep writing, every day, no excuses. You are not a writer if you don’t write. Start by writing what you love, find your own style and your own unique way of putting words on a page. Then, look for your market, your audience – find out what they want and give it to them, but with your own stamp all over it. As for trying a new career, embrace the change! Comfort zones are overrated. Get out there and scare yourself. And maybe keep a diary, too, just in case…
Lucy Brazier 
Love your answer to question 7. I hate most modern crime stories – as they rather exaggerate the gory details and are more and more about psychopaths. I prefer an old fashioned whodunnit, liked Georgette Heyer’s few crime novels (like her regency romances, too, as they are funny) – ok, the two I have read so far. Not as good as Agatha Christie, though. I have a soft spot for Dorothy Sayers’ Lord Peter Wimsey, too.
Would not think you quite up there, yet (have read the Secret Diary of PG), but you have a lot of time to get there … and I haven’t read the first tries of those ladies! And I enjoyed the Secret Diary. So I am really looking forward to more of your stuff!
Oh I have a looooong way to go before I get to Agatha Christie standard! I am not sure I will ever have the skills to be a proper mystery writer. All I can do is keep practicing 🙂 Having seen an awful lot of real life crime first hand, I must say that I prefer something a little lighter for my fiction.
You do not want to be a copy of Christie, when you can be the original Blazier!
My very thoughts exactly!! And at least I’ll know that I am the best at being me 🙂
While you can only ever be a copy of Christie, indeed! And I am glad there is you, as I like your writing style.
That means an awful lot to me, thank you so much. I shall be wearing a huge smile all day!
I don’t think you come across as tooooo grumpy… just to the point…
It reminds me of the character in Bones (TV show) who is a writer and a forensic anthrapologist, and when asked how she manages to fit both in she says “first I do one, then the other”
I have tried to model my answers to things on this for a long time…I rarely get interviewed mind you so it isn’t a think I have to do.
I particularly like the water into wine / wine into water comment 😀
I am usually much more jolly and witty and felt this came across as a bit jaded and irritated. Which I am not at all! I thought I was getting the hang of this interview malarkey haha. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good interview, just a bit more serious than my usual style 🙂
(How are your excited feet today?! Mine are crazy!)
yes, I’ll give you that…it is quite serious! but maybe it is good to keep them guessing… which version of Porter Girl will we meet today? cheerful and witty, girl next dor, serious and to the point, or rocking up with bez in tow for shenanigans 😉
my feet are super excited!!! I have had to weigh them down under my desk 😀 😀
Haha I like it! The many faces of PorterGirl. Best keep the gin version for behind closed doors, though 😉
I am so excited but also the anxiety is poking its head up. Still a lot to do but it’s going to be super!!
yes, that is probably true, there is no point in showing everyone everything all at once… 0_0
I’d say don’t be anxious, but that is nt how it works, and I would be too!
It will all work out mind you!! 😀 It is going to be awesome!!
Mind you, if I did that I might get some excellent publicity! Sounds like one for the Bez strategy to me 😀
These things always have a degree of stress attached to them, but only because I want to do the best job I can. I am proper excited to meet you though!! That’s going to be so cool!! 😀
oooh yes…definitely one for the Bez strategy!
I can understand that, it is a good sign really 😀 it shows that you care about it!!
I am excited to meet you too 😀 I can distract you from worrying with my inability to be too serious and inappropriate comments that I always seem to make when I meet new people!!
I once asked my friends new boyfriend if Stan was actually his real name, because I had a friend who had stan as a nickname…this was the first sentence i said to him!!
and I threatened to kill a new person at work because he attempted to steal the water for my coffee…
Oh, you will fit in just perfectly – that’s hardly even inappropriate by our standards 🙂 The two German ladies who will be there come out with some really random stuff – a combination of their direct nature and English being a second language. And don’t worry about the posh random chap in the blazer and pink trousers – he’s just my next door neighbour. And then there’s the music-type people, of course… You are going to be such a great help, I thank you!
Excellent 🙂 this sounds like my sort of crowd!
Morris dancers / stage crew / engineers do not go in for social niceties too often…
😀 this is going to be awesome!
WooHoo!!!!! 😀
Although…I feel I should point out that some of them do try for social niceties…but fail often 😉
It’s making the effort that counts! A small show of polite intentions is more than enough in my book 😉
(Not literally in my book – obviously in the book everyone is terribly polite.)
absolutely! it is definitely possible to see when people are trying to be polite!!
hehehe not many people have to make that distinction… 😀 😀
at least not many people I know…I don’t know many authors…
2 I think…