1. Speaking of the Lamb & Flag, I was wondering if you’d like to form a nudie mixed tag mud wrestling team to take on long-term champions, Keith and Deirdre. They only have three legs and three working eyes between them. I reckon we could get a WIN out of this one!

    2. If we win, I’ll have a word with Wily Bob McMayday, the most violent travel agent in the world, about a heat-seeker’s bronze-a-thon in Doncaster for the discounted price of only £4,000!!!

    3. Fear not! If we can’t get to Doncaster we can steal Cannonball Taffy O’Jones’ car and make use of the bridal suite at the Marveloso Splendido Hotelo in Wolverhampton. You know Cannonball. He’s getting married to that bird from the abattoir who looks like Ted Rogers.

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